Tag Archives: people

Divine Intervention

Out of nowhere came this urgent need to reconnect with him. It had been several years but took only minutes before his voice was in my ear and he was damning me for reaching out again. I’d found him in limbo, which wasn’t actually surprising, he’d already done his stint in India, studying with the masters, becoming a Yogi and whoring the knowledge he’d gained for himself in order to survive. Always just trying to survive.

He was back in the states on the west coast, ready to head east if I gave the word. He was tired and just wanted to lie down, wanted to lie down with me. But I hesitated, as I always did, and no matter how brief or split second my pause, that was always the deciding factor.

We relived each moment spent, every truth ever told, forgave all the pain caused by endless lies and selfish deceptions. It was cleansing. It was cathartic. It was the most honest we’d ever been.

We said goodbye and promised to stay connected, though time slipped away and we never really did. Only after I found myself lost, once more wandering blind in the black abyss, did I reach for him again, only this time he did not come. I searched and quickly found that a brain tumor had taken my sage to the other side, just six months after we said our final goodbye.

I slipped deeper into the pit where no light could penetrate, lingering in my pain with no will to move from that place; and I stayed there for three long agonizing years. Until one night he came to me in a dream.

The next morning I searched and quickly found a message that previously had not been received. A comment left on a post he’d written after reading my words.

There must be something

Worse than being alone

More painful than lonely

Something other than death

Though I’ve yet to find it –

“I’ve been searching too. Nothing of value. I thought it was karma but it’s really just life. You move me with this one. This is powerful, this is truth…dying’s not so bad. I’m not haunting, but I am knocking.”

Death had changed me, for what I believed to be forever, loss had snuffed out my light and I knew there was no coming back; accepted as my fate to simply exist for my remaining days; until he threw a rope into the well of angst and urged me to climb out.

That changed me more than death could ever do, for in that moment I was reminded what my pain had allowed me to forget; there is no death, only a shift of worlds and our connection is never truly lost; and if he could throw me a rope from the other side of life, I could sure as hell reach out and take back mine.

~ jillterry 7.1.18

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Something to think about ~

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I worked with her for seven years; a pearls and chiffon kinda gal, with matching cardigans all with grosgrain collars. Her hairstyle never varied, and never a hair out of place; whereas mine is a crazy curly mass that won’t be tamed, and could easily turn to dreads given a week without touching.

She comes from old southern money, which I hear is the best kind, as she never tired of boasting about it. Our sons are the same age and that’s about the only commonality we had; though hers was on various sports teams and drove a new Mercedes, and struggles with his grades, while mine is a musician, drives a seven year old truck and is in all advanced placement or honors courses.

She decided she didn’t want to work anymore, as her husband agreed to give her an allowance instead, and her time could be her own. On her last day she came into my office with a little something she picked up for me and told me as she handed it to me, “I hope you won’t be offended,” which immediately validated the dig in which it was meant, and taken.

It now sits on the corner of my mirror and reminds me daily, that being a free spirit and true to ones self is absolutely priceless, can’t be bought, and worth more than all the old southern money in the world. ~ jill

Jillterry.com


Quote of the day

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“I will never understand how being exposed to one toxic person can infect so many people.”

©2013 jillterry │jillterry.com


Contemplation

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As I walk along this sand covered patch of earth, the wind cool upon my flesh, bringing the waves to a crashing end, just inches from my feet; it’s hard for me to fathom that there are people dotting the same world, who woke to this day, hearts filled with hatred, souls set on death and destruction; under the same beautiful sun that kisses my skin even now.

©2013 jillterry
jillterry.com


Random

He was always rather
Random
Coming and going on
Whims
Staying only long
Enough
To see her interest
Piqued

©2010 Jill Terry


quote of the day

“To predict the behavior of ordinary people in advance, you only have to assume that they will always try to escape a disagreeable situation with the smallest possible expenditure of intelligence.”

~ Friedrich Nietzsche


Luau of life

Turquoise Jesus
In all His
Holiness
Dangling transparent
From her rearview
Mirror

Surrounded by flowers
Tangerine
Tropical
Glued to the
Dash
A plastic girl
Giving hula

Finding false
Comfort
In her co-pilot and
Lucky charm

I wonder…

Does a silver plaque
Warn
Pinned to her visor
To never drive
Faster
Than your angel
Can fly

Ⓒjillterry


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