Tag Archives: light

Divine Intervention

Out of nowhere came this urgent need to reconnect with him. It had been several years but took only minutes before his voice was in my ear and he was damning me for reaching out again. I’d found him in limbo, which wasn’t actually surprising, he’d already done his stint in India, studying with the masters, becoming a Yogi and whoring the knowledge he’d gained for himself in order to survive. Always just trying to survive.

He was back in the states on the west coast, ready to head east if I gave the word. He was tired and just wanted to lie down, wanted to lie down with me. But I hesitated, as I always did, and no matter how brief or split second my pause, that was always the deciding factor.

We relived each moment spent, every truth ever told, forgave all the pain caused by endless lies and selfish deceptions. It was cleansing. It was cathartic. It was the most honest we’d ever been.

We said goodbye and promised to stay connected, though time slipped away and we never really did. Only after I found myself lost, once more wandering blind in the black abyss, did I reach for him again, only this time he did not come. I searched and quickly found that a brain tumor had taken my sage to the other side, just six months after we said our final goodbye.

I slipped deeper into the pit where no light could penetrate, lingering in my pain with no will to move from that place; and I stayed there for three long agonizing years. Until one night he came to me in a dream.

The next morning I searched and quickly found a message that previously had not been received. A comment left on a post he’d written after reading my words.

There must be something

Worse than being alone

More painful than lonely

Something other than death

Though I’ve yet to find it –

“I’ve been searching too. Nothing of value. I thought it was karma but it’s really just life. You move me with this one. This is powerful, this is truth…dying’s not so bad. I’m not haunting, but I am knocking.”

Death had changed me, for what I believed to be forever, loss had snuffed out my light and I knew there was no coming back; accepted as my fate to simply exist for my remaining days; until he threw a rope into the well of angst and urged me to climb out.

That changed me more than death could ever do, for in that moment I was reminded what my pain had allowed me to forget; there is no death, only a shift of worlds and our connection is never truly lost; and if he could throw me a rope from the other side of life, I could sure as hell reach out and take back mine.

~ jillterry 7.1.18

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Mabon

As the Equinox is upon us once more, embrace this time of mystery and the balance of darkness and light. Take time to relax and enjoy the fruits of your labors, as we prepare for the shift to darkness and the approach of winter with the waning of the sun. Purge yourself of that which hinders your growth and accept only that which encourages it – out with the old, in with the new, during this time of death and rebirth. A blessed Mabon to all. 

9.22.16 j.a.terry Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ


As are you ☮

  


Sunshine dapples

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Blessed Ostara ||☽✯☾


Feel the Cosmic sway
as the balance shifts
Astrological year begins

Equal parts darkness and light
la luna e il sole
in my birthsign aligned

At dusk I go in preparation
for dawnings celebration 
To bask in the promise 
of the light half of this year 

©2015 | jillterry.com

  


Blessed Ostara ||☽✯☾

Feel the Cosmic sway
as the balance shifts
Astrological year begins

Equal parts darkness and light
la luna e il sole
in my birthsign aligned

At dusk I go in preparation
for dawnings celebration
To bask in the promise
of the light half of this year

☮jill

©2015 | jill terry

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Out of darkness 




toujours les tulipes

always the tulips
that ushered forth
the shadow of a memory
in a half forgotten dream

©2015 jillterry | jillterry.com

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Right side up

Reflected glass in the upside down lake of the void. Then came ripples of written pages, filled with truths and falsities of lost loves, forgotten fools, and followed sages. The only way out was to submerge the darkest depths, for all was illusion. It was in that darkness, she would find her light; long sought happiness, inner peace, and strength she never knew she possessed.

©2015 jill terry | jillterry.com

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