Tag Archives: fate

Perpetuation

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©2014 jillterry│jillterry.com

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In a word ~ RUN

masquerade1

You frolicked gaily at the masquerade
Swooned like a schoolgirl at a hit parade
Reaching and conversing throughout the day
Thinking to yourself you can do this thing

Clueless to what you’re setting yourself up for
A genius IQ does not smart this one make
It makes him cunning and wickedly dangerous
Numerous casualties left in his wake

Never to be believed
By those who think they know
Having seen only what he wants them to see
Accepting membership to his mutual admiration society

Oh, but those eyes and that innocent charm
You’re dreaming even now of being in his arms
While he claims you’re the only one understands
Sharing his stories of loneliness and pain

This isn’t fate and you haven’t touched his soul
He wants nothing from you but simple validation
If lucky another notch on his bed of four posts
To appease and arouse his manipulating ego

©2014 jillterry│jillterry.com


Fated

What’s written in the stars
cannot be changed
by the hearts
and whims of man ~

©2013 jill
jillterry.com

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It’s too late

We both knew it had to end
Couldn’t go on the way it was
One of us had to say stop
I couldn’t find the will or strength

And now that he’s gone
Turned his back and walked away
I find my self wanting to tell him
All the things he needed to know
All the stones I never unturned

But he’s gone now
Maybe not forever
But who can live for one day
When this day holds
No hope
No promise

And memories of yesterdays
Are shrouded in darkness

©2012 jillie
Jillterry.com


In this silence I believe…

First cut Solar Plexus
Vertical toward Crown
Counterclockwise he travels
Adding three more

Meticulously concentrated
With precision skill
Graceful fluidity
Masking exerted energies

Intently confident
A master at his craft
Superior abilities balanced with
Sheer will and determination

This perfect stranger
Fate forced upon my path
Whose concern I feel
Compassion openly shown

Determined to make me well
Give me exactly what I want
While doing everything just right
Guaranteeing quality of life

Of which this stranger
Cares and believes
That I, also a stranger
Absolutely deserve

My last night in lockdown
My final in captivity
My body disease free
Major organs removed

Final meltdown
Alone I sit recovering
In this silence I believe
As the rage subsides in me

Realizing he did more
Than simply remove diseased tissue

With the very first incision
He unchained my soul
From the demons had latched on
And for so long been in total control

He untangled the jumbled mess
Of my heart, my soul, my mind
He left me in-tuned and balanced
A shifted outlook on life

Centered on my self
The core of my very being
Coming to the end
The first book of my life

Filled with passion
Raw, unfiltered desire
Not a single want to look back
But to start penning the sequel

Of which I alone
Am the shining star
Having found my own light
As I stand and walk silently away

From that rocky shore
That blackened abyss
Teeming with fear-filled monsters
Once known as my life

©2012 jillie
jillterry.com


Reawakening

Detached I had become
From all that surrounds me
Seeing things from a skewed and twisted perception
Seeing – but not through my own eyes

Focusing on nonsensical aspects
Letting the truth slip away
Allowing myself to free fall
Because of it

Then the long dark cloud blew in
Forever looming – blocking out the light
All light – leaving an abyss of blackest pitch
Bent on destruction and slow painful consumption

Finding myself once more at the threshold
Not heaven’s pearly gates
Nor hell’s flaming lakes
Simply death – nothing more

ENTRY DENIED
Not once but thrice
Back into the corporeal world
Desperately I was pulled

By the very light I allowed to be diffused
Due to lack of faith, fear and doubt
The blinding light that never fades
Never goes out – transcends all

Time
Space
Worlds

The eternal light of LOVE
Borderless – all powerful – Infinite
Highlighting the subtle insignificance
Of so many aspects upon which we place importance

The scale by which all else should be measured
The one clear path to truth – understanding – happiness
The only guide I will ever again follow

Throughout the remainder of this life
Into my death – onto the next

~ jill

©2012 jillterry.com


Stop, Pause, Rewind

It had been a week since they buried their eldest son; something that no parent should ever have to do. She sat alone in the den, her husband having long since gone to bed. There wasn’t much communication; it seemed there was nothing left to say; only grief, sadness and deafening silence hung between them.

She emptied the wine bottle into her glass, pulled the blanket tighter around her shoulders, picked up the remote and pressed play; and there he was, alive in her eyes once more. Running across the lawn with their old dog Dixie, splashing in the bathtub, bubbles flying everywhere, as he giggled and smiled into the camera. She sobbed into her glass and reached for a tissue; images, memories and a life that was no more, flashing across the screen, illuminating the darkened room.

Then she heard her husband’s voice calling out from across the room; “Tommy, get daddy a beer,” he said, as the little boy, just barely two, ran in front of the camera, bare feet slapping across the tile, his diaper sagging as he stopped and took the empty can from his father’s hand.

The camera followed as he made his way up the step into the dining room and on into the kitchen, where he stopped at the trash to dispose of the beer can, but not before he raised it to his lips, tipped his little head back, emptying the remaining contents into his mouth; his parent’s laughter, captured forever, as they delighted in his shenanigans. A moment later the refrigerator door opened, the light came on and back into view he came, all smiles, holding out the cold, full can, “Here, dada.”

She didn’t dwell on why her son was dead, the cause and effect of actions all his own. All she saw was her precious child, taken too soon, lost to her forever. And she didn’t stop to think about the mother on the other side of the city, who was grieving the death of her own child, whose life was snuffed out by the drunk driver who crossed the yellow line and hit them head on; begging for just one more moment to hold her baby in her arms, driving herself insane wondering what she had done to deserve such cruel fate.

© jillterry


Absinthe Wishes and Lithium Dreams

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He wanders aimlessly through worlds of destruction; mist colored mountains, too blinded to see. A victim of self-induced misfortune, an inflicter of pain. Endless. Eternal. Walking through the flames, wearing the scars like badges of honor; baptisms of fire consecrated in vain.

Infinite lifetimes spent. Second-hand knowledge attained. Wasted on this tortured mind; soul hollowed eons ago. A teacher to some perhaps, but no man of genius as once she believed. Prostituting his suffering for personal gain; unwilling to succumb to sanity’s necessity.

Eager to believe his revelations; as if he, a mere mortal, born with transcendent faculties; innate knowledge awarded by God. A favored soul having lived a longer time. Acquired more. Progressed further. Ordained and reincarnated at the desire of God; to aide the progress of mankind; or at the very least, the twin of her flame; to continue the journey, on the path by her side.

A monster disguised as her own personal savior; a wanton demon, this King of the Damned. Driven now by the voice in his head, whispering night and day; pushing him further, closer to the edge. “Burn the pages, take your bow; sweet surrender in dawns early hour.”

Fare thee well; to you, Dark Prince; on your voyage, your final affair. Role fulfilled, as it was written; take heed in the knowing; until we meet again…

Ⓒjillterry


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