On the road

I’m traveling and unavailable, but even if I weren’t, I would still be unavailable to you.

Truth is
You don’t know me
I don’t want you to
I don’t know you
I know I don’t want to

I can understand why Veronica Lake kicked you to the curb for sitting on your ass smoking weed and waiting to die. What the fuck kind of existence is that?

I also understand that people like us get up and go to work every day to make an honest living to support ourselves and families, only to have a portion of our pay go to people like you who are too fucking lazy and irresponsible to get a job; though quite capable, but believe it’s your right to be taken care of, as if the world owes you something simply because you were bourn into it.

Fuck that

If you can’t do the public then get out of it. Find yourself an abandoned asylum somewhere and take up residence with the local ghosts that can co-exist with your own.

I’m not your friend
I never was
I have nothing for you
I never will

I understand your kind, whether you’re flopping on the sofa of an acquaintance/friend, or roaming the halls of your country estate.

You’re all the same inside
Empty
Looking for someone to fill the void

I am not filler

Please don’t contact me again

jill@jillterry.com

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Nemesis

He was an intrusion, of absolute proportion; penetrating her world after ingesting her soul in words; adjusting his intention to mirror her verse; and yield to him she did, as a scent on the breeze. He fooled and beguiled, wrapping her so tightly in his web of illusion, so as to not draw breath, in the absence of his presence.

But in her darkest hour, when his debauchery was arrogantly revealed, she did not succumb to the iniquitous pain; but gripped the dagger determinedly in both hands, withdrawing it from the gaping wound; raising it to the heavens, a goddess of just punishment and vengeance.

A victim escaped, from his kingdom of abysmal darkness. A defiant act he could not discern; infuriating, frightening, invading his calculated demeanor; pulling him to the edge, as she resurrected from certain death; causing him to strike unabashedly, showing himself the fool within his own pathetic realm.

She allows him these glimpses that keep him coming; an end to satisfy their story; in his angst-filled world that is without end; the poetess wielding a witches pen; hovering over past lives, this one and the next; a bitter enemy writing the text, an unbeatable opponent, an avenger rejoicing his downfall, delighting in his much deserved punishment.

© jillterry

Death Trap

She doesn’t seek his memory, it just comes creeping; and when it does, that’s all there is.

Its nothing to do with fear or inspiration; building a fan base that was there long before he was; or anything at all for matter of fact. For who would dream of seeking such hurt.

Its simply a means of soul survival; an attempt to heal, her wounds on her own. Purging her being in the form of words; bloodletting her system of his poison, his disease. Being caught in the death trap, he sets and springs.

His desperation for reprieve, amounting to nothing; empty words of apology and pleas of forgiveness. He gobbles her words and his ego grows, waiting for Twitter to tell him there’s more.

© jillterry

Multi-purpose

He uses them for everything
They often don’t mean anything
He leaves them with nothing

Varying degrees of his
Needs or wants
Determine the depth
He is forced to
Or willing
To go

Gluttony being his
Favored sin
He feasts upon
Their emotional
Need

Savoring the flavor
Of collective fear
Seasoned lightly
With his own

Desire but a word
Ecstasy a button
Easily pushed
With a pressured curve

The same spot every time
No matter the shape
The age
The size

Something he mastered
Way back when
Delighting in the power
Necessary for his
Survival

Giving them everything
Filling them up
Leaving them empty
To drown in their
Sorrow

© jillterry

Collective fear

I feared the words
He spoke were truth

Of me
About me
In spite of me

Because
He knew me

Because
I let him

Because
I wanted him to

Like none other
Before or after

Deeper
Better

To the core

Then left to wonder
If he knew me
At all

© jillterry

Reparation

Within her circle of stones
She drifts back to that place
Casting out shadows
Demons handsome face

Once lost in his darkness
A labyrinth of despair
Longing for an illusion
Twin flames sweet embrace

That lone wandering drifter
Disguised as a sage
Stealing souls
Trying to make it pay

She felt he was coming
Hyena slowly circling
Hell fires burning
Raging like lightening

Call down the thunder
Glance back courageously
Lifetimes spent stalking
Doors opening and closing

Atonement is sought
Peace offered up
Discounting her wrath
Holding nothing from the past

© jillterry

Backtrack

She found herself traveling
South on A1A
Desperate now to get back
To that place

Hunting ghosts
Slaying demons
Searching for that lost
Part of her self

Since the door was slammed
Locked down tight
She was filed away
On the back of a shelf

Images unraveling
With the hum of the miles
A Technicolor reel
Unraveling in her mind

She reaches the bridge
Inlet in sight
Closes her eyes
Lets out a sigh

© jillterry

Worth retrieving

She watches the water
Flow lazily by her window
Gently being pulled
By the slow moving current

Offering further proof
In the power of connections
Something she once put
Total faith in

Reduced to a place
Where she no longer believes
Still searching for her own truth
Once given so freely

A journey she must make
In order to retrieve it
Tangled in that web
Of lies and deceit

© jillterry

 

4:44

4:44 eyes open wide
Lay in the dark
Gaze at the clock

4:44 make a wish
So the final chapter
Begins

4:44 everywhere I look
Is it malicious intent
Or only mere coincidence

4:44 how to break the spell
Locate and remove the
Emotional connection chip

4:44 she looked at his photo
Saw right through
Called his emotional baggage

4:44 he died that day
Sexual abuse at such
A young age

4:44 he lost all trust
Made it his life’s mission
To punish all women

4:44 he took what he wanted
Truth of it was
I could have loved him

4:44 heartless son of a bitch
Died twice on my watch
Come to raise the dead

4:44 just go away
To your charm once more
I refuse to fall prey

© jillterry