She doesn’t seek his memory, it just comes creeping; and when it does, that’s all there is.
Its nothing to do with fear or inspiration; building a fan base that was there long before he was; or anything at all for matter of fact. For who would dream of seeking such hurt.
Its simply a means of soul survival; an attempt to heal, her wounds on her own. Purging her being in the form of words; bloodletting her system of his poison, his disease. Being caught in the death trap, he sets and springs.
His desperation for reprieve, amounting to nothing; empty words of apology and pleas of forgiveness. He gobbles her words and his ego grows, waiting for Twitter to tell him there’s more.
There comes a certain “feel,” no matter where you happen to be, whenever his thoughts turn in your direction.
It starts at the basic level of the flesh; like the cool breeze on a crisp autumn night; tantalizing and chilling all at once.
Your blood pressure rises, heart rate increases, as he sends invisible waves of desire, cascading in your direction.
At the sound of his voice, a chemical reaction triggers, and suddenly you are seized; with a mix of exhilaration and excitement like none other you have ever known.
A connection is what he seeks; the ability to reach out and snatch you from reality; pulling you into his realm of illusion; with nothing more than his thoughts and voice.
Once he connects, the feeding begins; everything you want to hear, anyone you want him to be; larger than life, too good to be true; having searched for eternity and now loving only you.
Before you can blink, you are on a downward spiral; surrendered completely while careening out of control.
He drains you empty, while filling you up; taking every scrap offered, pillaging the rest while you dream.
Making his exit as quickly as he comes; a puddle of nothing, you remain on the floor. Left alone, to sift through the pain; cloaked in his filthy blanket of noir.
A good long
Bouncing off doors
A singular voice
Bent on spiritual
Bolt the door
Shut my eyes
“To predict the behavior of ordinary people in advance, you only have to assume that they will always try to escape a disagreeable situation with the smallest possible expenditure of intelligence.”
~ Friedrich Nietzsche
I see you suffering, and I wish there was something I could do for you.
I witness your pain, and my own heart aches.
I see you spiraling, faster each day; downward motion to nowhere land.
I wonder who’ll be waiting when you reach the end.
Unsure what led you to this path; you no longer walk, but run these days.
The shift came sudden and without any warning.
Your sanity slipped and crazed madness set in.
You pushed aside all that was real; lost sight of your self completely.
Chasing that ever illusive sensation; known simply as euphoria.
You haven’t a positive word to say; allowing negativity to swallow you whole.
I say these things, because I know this place; having visited a time or two.
Your beauty and intelligence still shines in your eyes; though clouded by your tears.
With love and understanding, I offer this prayer; that someday soon, you’ll find your way home.