I was challenged today to define the path of happiness in 500 words or less…let’s give it a go, shall we?
The way I see it, happiness would be living to my full potential and becoming everything I’m capable of becoming. This is not something that can be bought or given, but rather something I have to self-achieve. The trick to keeping a positive attitude along this path is to accept the life lessons given along the way…my problem is I tend to stop and want to question them instead of finding comfort in them.
For those who look at me and see a multi-published author or simply a good person who deserves happiness and can’t understand why I haven’t found it yet, let me try to explain a bit of my frustration…
Being in a position to start and finish my first novel was absolutely thrilling; publishing that novel was a phenomenal feeling, just as it has been with each and every one and those were personal goals that I set and met, and something to be proud of. But simply writing and publishing isn’t enough for me, because I believe I have within me, the potential to be running with the big boys. I know this with every ounce of my being and believe it and live it every single day of my life.
For 5 long years, I’ve devoted more of myself to my craft than anything I’ve ever done in my life. If I was paid for my time, energy and determination, I’d be rich beyond my wildest dreams, but unfortunately that’s not how it works. I’ve been beaten, bruised, battered and taken for an enormous amount of money, but I’ve never given up and I’m not about to.
I’ve had lessons thrown at me from every direction and somehow always manage to come through it, and although I’m tired of running to get to where I want to be…I’m not giving up. I can see the train and soon I’ll be on board, and then I can take comfort in all those life lessons that were thrown in my path, as I ease back in the seat and catch my breath.
It’s not what I want to be…it’s who I am.
“I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free.”