Excerpt; What Lies Within

They say a person is never truly dead, so long as there are those left behind to keep the memory of them alive, but it was the memories that had driven Louis to this point of no return. Not memories of the wonderful times and the love they had shared, but rather the hazy moments preceding the accident that had taken her from him; the flash of bright lights, the sounds of searing metal and screeching tires, meshed with her piercing screams; the overpowering scents of gasoline and the dampened earth, and then there was nothing; nothing but silence, and the blood, so much blood.

The arrow of time had pierced his heart and there was no reason, it seemed, for him to move forward. For the moment she’d left this world and entered another, the life had bled out of him and it was time, he’d decided, to end this misery.

He sat on the edge of the bed and reached for the bottle of Halcion that Dr. Baker had prescribed at Sebastian’s insistence. Sebastian, he thought, as his hand tightened around the bottle and he let out a shaky breath. He’d made certain that his Will was in order and that the old man would be well taken care of for the duration of his life. He’d toyed with the notion of leaving a letter, explaining his reasons, but he knew that wasn’t necessary, for Sebastian had been with the family for as long as Louis could remember and was closer to him than his own father had ever been.

Sebastian was a gentleman’s gentleman, very old school and from a time when wealthy men had personal servants. He offered Mr. Van Ness the kind of loyalty that no amount of money could buy, and so it was only natural that the Van Ness’ had named him as Louis’ guardian and benefactor. It had been twenty odd years since their passing, and Sebastian had come to love Louis as his own son, but even that was not enough to save Louis from the grief that now consumed him.

He poured the contents of the bottle into his hand and counted roughly twenty-seven little blue pills. He shot the lot of them into his mouth then reached for the glass that sat on the bedside table and washed them down with tepid water. The deed was done and now it was only a matter of time until he was free from the earthly hell he’d been dwelling in.

He walked across the room and stood before the wall of glass that looked out over the city, taking in each and every detail, knowing it would be for the last time. The rain came softly, and although his view became distorted, just as his mind grew weary, still he watched, as life played out before him. He felt a slight pang of melancholy when he realized that the world would go on without him tomorrow, just as it did today, and other than a handful of people who would surely mourn his passing, his demise would not directly affect the balance of the universe.

©Copyright 2007 by Jill Terry. All Rights Reserved

~ by Jill Terry on January 10, 2008.